The Church of Reptilian Jesus

This is a modern twist on the classic Reptilian Nativity scene....

Sun, 20 Jan 2013 22:24:35 -0500

This is a modern twist on the classic Reptilian Nativity scene. Not only are the parents of the Lord in mangers as well, but Joseph is closer to The Reptilian Jesus. This creates new symbolic meaning to the entire scene. We hope your Reptimas was happy and holy for you and your family and friends.

Also there’s a pirate.

It’s been a while.

Sat, 25 Aug 2012 00:07:40 -0400

It’s been a while.

“Share, Share, Share,” The Reptilian Lord calls out....

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 00:31:13 -0400

“Share, Share, Share,” The Reptilian Lord calls out. “Share my image and be fishers of lizards, snakes, tortoises…”

The Reptilian Lord wants the love of the children that He created. He does not want to send them to the firey pits of dispair. You’ve saved yourself, now save others…

Reptilian Jesus approves of this page.I don’t know why the...

Mon, 25 Jun 2012 00:26:58 -0400

Reptilian Jesus approves of this page.

I don’t know why the page was slanted and so sloppy looking when the messiah viewed it, but I shan’t question it or Him.

Reptilian Jesus flyin the skies, saving us from our own sins

Fri, 08 Jun 2012 23:29:18 -0400

Reptilian Jesus flyin the skies, saving us from our own sins

One Night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the...

Fri, 01 Jun 2012 17:14:26 -0400

One Night a man had a dream. He dreamed he was walking along the beach with the Reptilian Lord. Across the sky flashed scenes from his life. For each scene, he noticed two sets of footprints in the sand; one belonged to him and the other to Reptilian Jesus.

When the last scene of his life flashed before him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of his life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times in his life.

This really bothered him and he questioned Reptilian Jesus about it. “Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you you’d walk with me all the way, but I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life, there is only one set of footprints. I don’t understand why when I needed you most you would leave me.” The Reptilian Messiah replied, “My precious, precious child, I love you and would never leave you. During your times of trial and suffering when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.”

Reptilian Jesus battling Satan.

Thu, 31 May 2012 21:20:11 -0400

Reptilian Jesus battling Satan.

Reptilian Jesus resting after a long day of saving us.

Thu, 31 May 2012 08:48:53 -0400

Reptilian Jesus resting after a long day of saving us.

NEED YOU MORE PROOF?

Tue, 29 May 2012 15:29:49 -0400

NEED YOU MORE PROOF?

Photo

Mon, 28 May 2012 19:23:42 -0400

Believe. He did this.For YOU.

Sat, 26 May 2012 13:29:27 -0400

Believe. He did this.

For YOU.

Reptilian Jesus is only angered by his own love, so much love...

Sat, 26 May 2012 13:28:36 -0400

Reptilian Jesus is only angered by his own love, so much love that he allows his children to lose their way.

Photo

Sat, 26 May 2012 13:27:23 -0400

Another semi-accurate portrayal of Reptilian Christ.

Sat, 26 May 2012 00:29:46 -0400

Another semi-accurate portrayal of Reptilian Christ.

One portrayal of our reptilian saviour looking awfully suave.

Sat, 26 May 2012 00:28:00 -0400

One portrayal of our reptilian saviour looking awfully suave.